My Boyfriend Puts His Child Before Me, What Should I Do?

What Are You Supposed To Do When Your Bf Puts His Chind Before You?

  • You’re supposed to replace his kids or child in that regard. 
  • You’re supposed to give him unconditional love manifested differently. 
  • You’re supposed to give him all of the physical intimacy that he needs. 
  • You’re supposed to be loving and supportive, never critical.

Why You Shouldn’t Be Critical When Your Bf Puts His Child Before You?

When your Boyfriend Puts His Child Before you, You shouldn’t be critical because it’s not loving. He didn’t love you so you could be his editor so that you could be the one who checks his work. 

He loves you because you showed him how loving you were to him. You don’t get to do a bait-and-switch and get away it. Read This full article to know your answers to “My Boyfriend Puts His Child Before Me”.

So naturally, if you’re not the woman of his dreams by how you take care of your boyfriend, why wouldn’t he go back to the woman who took care of him except for when he wants sex. 

Is this clicking or are all your resentment buttons getting pushed? Are you being triggered? Well blah blah blah — I don’t care. 

I know what works. Do you know what works? You don’t know what works because we’re not taught. 

We’re not given this information growing up. No one goes to school and in third or fourth grade begins to learn about relationships, how biology impacts human beings, about what you should expect from a relationship, and what a relationship should expect from you.

So you haven’t learned all of these things where I have and I’m here to share them with you. Why?

You’re in a relationship to be happy. You’re in a relationship to feel more love than you’ve ever felt on an ever-increasing basis and you’re not getting that. Why?

Relationships are designed to provide that you’re not getting it because you don’t know how to work it. If you wanna know about “My Boyfriend Puts His Child Before Me” then scroll down fast and read that 6 points given below.

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I could give you a Maserati, hand you the keys, and if you’ve never driven one you never know how to start it much less enjoy it.

Let’s crank it up a notch. I could give you the keys to an airplane. You’re going to die if you take off because you haven’t learned how to operate it.

Relationships have more moving parts than airplanes. You need to learn. When you do learn and you start doing what works.

Your boyfriend is going to forget about his child, he’s going to go to you, and then you’re going to have everything that you can ever want. 

That’s it, it’s not much more complicated than that. So hopefully, this is of benefit. Hopefully, you didn’t get mad at me for telling you the truth. I don’t think you did, did you? It’s a lot to think about, isn’t it? It does.

What can you do when your Boyfriend Puts His Child Before you? Read the full article to know more.

Here’s the interesting thing. 

It doesn’t put a burden on you because when you do things right the benefits are so powerful that they’re overwhelming. 

I mean you’ll be able to walk around all the time in love and so will he when you know how to treat him.

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Best Time To Meet Your Boyfriend’s Kids? Puts His Child Before Me

This is a heavy and controversial topic amongst the stepmom, divorce & co-parenting community. As always I don’t think that there is a one-size-fits-all approach to this so I can’t give you a definite answer. 

That being said there are six contributing factors that I think that you need to consider before you take a leap and meet your boyfriend’s kids. To know more about ” My Boyfriend Puts His Child Before Me ” read all six points.

1: Are You In It For The Long Haul? 

I have a really hard time when people introduce their kids to their partners or their boyfriends when they’re just casually dating. 

I don’t think it’s fair to the kids. If the relationship doesn’t work out they have another person in their life leave or another disruption to the routine. 

kids have been through enough with their parent’s divorce I think that it’s really important that parents think long and hard and make sure that there’s a future involved with people who they introduce to their kids.

2: Are The Kids Ready For This? 

How are the kids doing with their parent’s separation? 

  • Are they struggling emotionally? 
  • Are they in this space to meet a new person? 

Is it in their best interest to be introduced to someone new? Kids all adjust to their parent’s divorce in different ways and this very much needs to be considered before you do the big introduction. 

3: Do They Know About You? 

I think it’s so important for kids to get a heads-up before this big introduction.

Their dad needs to have a conversation with them about what’s going on, what this looks like, and what this will mean moving forward. 

It gives them time to get used to the idea and to ask any questions that may come up. 

4: Are You Mentally Prepared For Their Reactions? 

  • Look they could love you
  • They could hate you
  • They could be indifferent 
  • They could be uncomfortable 
  • They could be stand-offish
  • They could even be a complete nightmare

I think it’s so important that you and your boyfriend sit down and have a conversation about their potential reactions and how you guys are going to respond if and when this happens. 

5. How Is This Ex-Wife Going To React? 

look I’m not saying that this is a make-or-break situation or that she really gets to dictate whether or not you’re introduced to the kids, but I will say it’s something that you might want to think about.

In some situations, the dad lets the ex-wife know and gives her a heads-up when he’s introducing them to a new girlfriend.

In other cases based on the dynamic of that family, that’s not the best route to go. There’s really no like I said one-size-fits-all approach. 

Either way, it’s worth having a conversation with your boyfriend about how this could all pan out before the big introduction. Personally, I’m all about being prepared for the worst while still hoping for the best. 

6: Have You Really Considered What Life Will Be Like As A Stepmom?

So many stepmoms have this fairytale perception of what life will be like as a stepmom or when there are kids involved. Often those women are in for a huge shock:

  • Your life is dictated by a co-parenting schedule
  • Extracurricular activities
  • There are sick days
  • There’s barf
  • There are messes
  • There’s discipline 
  • There are behaviors 
  • There are issues that come with co-parenting with an ex-wife

What else is there?…

It’s just there’s just a whole lot of never-ending stuff! I’m not saying that it’s not amazing and that I’m not so grateful that this is the route that my life took, but it’s not all hearts and sparkles.

I think it’s so important that you sit down and talk to your partner about what life will look like with his kids involved because it’s a huge-huge change from living the single Bachelorette life on your own.

Conclusion

I’m willing to bet that right now your relationship is fairly simple because it doesn’t involve the kids. As soon as kids are thrown into the equation, step-family life can get a little bit complicated.

So just be prepared for that and how it’s gonna change the dynamic of your relationship.

Basically to answer your question if you’re in it for the long haul and have really thought about all the things that I’ve talked about then go for it… If you think it’s the right time then that’s up to you and your partner.

But I do want to reiterate that I don’t think this is a decision that should be taken lightly.

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